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Showing posts from March, 2009

The positive side of being here

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There are actually a lot of positive things to say about this place and my experience here. First of all, from the point of view of material comfort and facility, I am very well served. The surroundings are frankly more pleasing than nearly anything in Vrindavan. The ashram itself is beautiful in terms of architecture and gardening. The Ganges in its clearest and purest state is nearby. The Rajaji Park is nearby and the view of the green hills across the Ganga is something that cannot be found in the plains. The weather has been pretty ideal--neither as hot nor dry as Vrindavan, nor quite as humid as Bengal. My workload is not great. I have two small classes of students and the weekly Gita class. My students like and respect me, and I actually enjoy teaching, for what it is worth. I get a stipend which is generous for what is really a voluntary position, considering that food, board and facilities are provided. My rooms are clean, with a kitchenette and modern bathroom facilities. In t

Look what came in the mail

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Unwell all day in body and mind, licking my wounds by looking for rhymes. The rain came down at quarter to four. I did not realize until quite late that night, the drumbeat of rain was really a code: Devi had sent a messenger cloud. Decrypted, her voice came through, clear and bold, and this is what her letter told: O Manjari! You're at least 12 by now. You're old enough to know better. It is strange you have to be told that you and the sakhis, not I, hold the lila in the palms of your hands. Don't you know your role? You're not there just to sweep the kunja, or stop Krishna from coming in when Lalita scolds. You're not there just to wait for nectar to fall. Don't you know what seva and dasi mean? Who's the servant and who's the Queen? O Dasi! Krishna was speaking to you that night when he told Arjuna he had to fight! You too have a field of work, so do; Work your field of duty, kuru. Do you think it was easy for Arjuna to fight? But he was a warrior an

Śrī-kṛṣṇa-kīrtana and the Bhāgavatam

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Some observations: I remember the first time I read Śrī-kṛṣṇa-kīrtana , I immediately sensed the discomfort that Gaudiya Vaishnavas post-Rupa Goswami would have felt with some aspects of the story. But I also recognized what they would have liked, and that is really what this whole reading of the book is about. Here are some preliminary observations: First of all, Rupa Goswami states in Ujjvala-nīlamaṇi that the pūrva-rāga of the nāyikā is usually described first. Here it is Krishna who is overcome with desire and Radha who resists. In Vidagdha-mādhava , for instance, it is Radha who is affected and she sends sakhīs to Krishna, who refuses her. This gives an opportunity to describe Radha's disillusionment and distress... the intensity of her love. In the second chapter we will learn that Radha is only 11 years old. We don't know how old Krishna is, but he sounds like a real brat, with very little redeeming about his character. He is full of lust and when he gets turned

Chandra Vadani

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This is the top of the mountain. We walked the last kilometer, and there were stairs, so no alpinist heroics, but the air is thin enough to make our heads all spin. We look down on freewheeling falcons flying far above the terraced slopes. Wisps of cloud cling to neighbor peaks like the yaksha's doot , resting weary from his trip, waiting maybe for more messages to bring the beloved, who wanes upon the snowy summits that trim the no longer lost horizon. Devi mantras, dhaks and dhols, sussurating Sapta-shati, bellows and bells. I buy my coconut and bring it to you, Devi Chandravadani. O Yoga Maya, I am with you again, under this pale and crystal sky. Like I was in Vrindavan, in elated circumambulation; Like I was in in Nabadwip, under the midnight black and tangled branches of Pora Ma. I am praying once again for what you have, with which you tantalize, but never give; I beg you: apavrinu apavrinu . From here on high, Paurnamasi Devi, from this tiny particle of Govardhan, from this

What am I doing here?

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I mentioned Ma Seva Bharati the other day. After my RRSN reading yesterday, I ran into her on the promenade by the Ganga. We stopped to talk. She is still ruminating over her month-long bhakti experience with Dhanurdhara Swami and other senior Iskcon old timers. Ma Seva was full of questions about me. "I was amazed," she said, "to learn that the devotees think that Radha and Krishna's love affairs are the highest truth, beyond even Brahman. Do you also believe that?" That is a big question to take in one swallow. I said, "Yes. But you have to start from the point of understanding that the Supreme Truth is personal. You are a person, so why do you think that in the state of perfection you will be less than what you are now? And why would the Supreme Truth be something less than what you are now, in the state of bondage?" "They are so strict," she said. "I think bhakti is only for the healthy. They told me that you have to take a com

Remembering my first meeting with Ananta Das Baba

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I went to the Ganga for my RRSN reading today. I am ashamed to admit that I forgot to include Ananta Das Babaji Maharaj in my list of gurus the other day. I have now corrected that . Our little group is growing. There is a Bengali devotee, a Gaudiya Vaishnava, who lives in a little hut on the Virbhadra Road. I saw him today and invited him to come to listen. I think he got a taste of something he was missing. I first met Ananta Dasji in 1982 or thereabouts, in Puruliya district. I was invited up there in the run-up to the Quincentenary of Mahaprabhu's appearance. We went to Kunjabihari Dasji's birthplace not far from Puruliya city. Then we went off to Manbhoom district, which would be in Jharkhand state now. That is where I met Ananta Dasji. I don't remember all the details now. I remember that there were so many people with Radha Kund tilak everywhere. They all looked like they had just stepped out of Radha Kund. I went to some villages that were really isolated. You

Nagari Das

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Last time I was in Vrindavan I picked up a book called Nāgarī dāsa kī vāṇī (ed. Vrajavallabha Sharan, Vrindavan: Sri Sarvesvara Press, 1966) . Nagari Das was a Nimbarki virakta who lived in the mid-18th century (b. 1699, d. 1765). Some of you may have read my article on Prabodhananda Saraswati. What really struck me about the research I did for that article is the extent to which sectarian feeling dominated the Vaishnava world and how historical accounts differ, preserving the extensive prejudices and resentments that exist in one or the other factions. Not that these may not have foundation. For instance, for all of my appreciation of the Radha-vallabhi tradition, I take it that the evidence points to the kind of ingratitude and inability to acknowledge the human avenues of divine mercy I wrote about in a previous post. The Radhavallabhi tradition says that Harivamsa wrote the  Rādhā-rasa-sudhā-nidhi  when he was five years old. Do I have any takers for that one? They say he go

Nivṛtta and Rasika

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Advaitaji has duly noted my return to active blogging and has immediately taken up his active role as a defender of the pure Goswami siddhanta. I bow down to him and his service to Srimati Radharani. In their commentaries on that Bhakti Rasamrita Sindhu verse (3.5.2), Jiva Goswami and Visvanatha Cakravarti clearly say that nivṛtta refers to those who have no taste for madhurya rasa , not to renunciates -  asmād rasād virakteṣv anupayogitvād ayogyatvāt. In the commentaries there is nothing said about renunciates at all. I have made this point earlier, in my blog of December 16, 2006 and perhaps even more often. Perhaps Jagat has overlooked that or perhaps he simply doesn't want to admit it. His interpretation of that verse is not just wrong, it is highly irresponsible because it could lead to the conclusion that the more illicit sex one has, the more one qualifies for madhura rasa . At any rate, if renunciation would disqualify someone from madhura rasa , then why the very autho

Gratitude, honesty and commitment to the truth

I posted this verse a long time ago, but on my Sunday walk yesterday it was one of my meditative verses. na dīkṣāsyāḥ śikṣā-śravaṇa-paṭhane vā guru-mukhāt tathāpīyaṁ rādhā tri-jagad-abalā-vismaya-bhuvām | kalāmbhodheḥ śaurer api parama-santoṣaṇa-kṛtāṁ kalānām ācāryā vraja-mṛga-dṛśām apy ajani sā || Our Radhika was never initiated, nor did she ever take any lessons from a shiksha guru. Even so, she has become the acharya from whom the doe-eyed Vraja sundaris learn all the arts of satisfying the heroic artist himself, Krishna, arts that are the source of amazement to every other attractive damsel in the three worlds. (GLA 11.124) Well, that is Radha: the svarūpa-śakti , the eternal embodiment of the highest power known in existence: that of Love. I was reflecting on this, because I have a strong saṁskāra that makes me think it is important to acknowledge one's gurus. In fact, it is my feeling that acknowledging gurus is the whole point of parampara. I have written about this

Ramabhadracharya, Faith and Hearing

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Did my usual Ganga walk on Sunday. Had a bit of a treat. Swami Ramabhadracharya was giving a Bhāgavata-saptāha at Paramarth Niketan. I just found out now by looking at the linked page above that he is blind. Anyway, there is no doubt that he is one of the top draws in the Bhāgavata-saptāha field, and there was a pretty big crowd, including quite a number of sadhus. He is, I think, a Ramanandi, even though his tilak suggests Ramanuja. Thinking about it, his being blind might explain why his movements were a little strange, like a bhāvuka , but somewhat awkward. Also, his tilak also looked a little weird, like when you don't use a mirror... not in this picture, though. Have to be impressed by anyone who gets a PhD when blind. I split my participation in two, first going before bathing, and returning afterward. You have to be impressed by the fact that these Bhāgavata speakers manage to keep an audience's attention for 4-5 hours at a time. The crowd had not diminished in th

Radha nama.

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Sitting here working on Bhagavat-sandarbha and listening to Gaurava Krishna Goswami singing the "Radha Nama sange Braja 84 kos yatra" which I mentioned before. The track lasts 45 minutes, so you have to be kind of addicted to Radha's name to listen to it, but I don't find it all monotonous. In fact, I want to play it over and over. It's a real pick-me-up, a real upper. This really awakens nostalgia for Vrindavan. Sri Yamunaji ki laharen bole Sri Radha Radha! Vrindavan karkata bole Sri Radha Radha ! Brahma kund men (Radhe Radhe), Gopishwar men (Radhe Radhe), ... He goes through all the places on the 84 kos parikrama. Several refrains... hamaro dhana radha sri radha sri radha, parama dhana radha radha radha radha radha! jivana dhana radha radha radha radha radha! Bhaja mana sri radhe gopal ! There are some hokey special effects, like echo and reverb, but they manage to work, somehow. I was just reading in Osho's commentary to Gita 4 where

Ganga Ma

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The sky is cloudy today and there is quite a breeze, almost automnal. My most enthusiastic listener was there today with his wife and two small boys. Turns out he has only been in Rishikesh for a couple of months. He is the pujari at an ashram near the river. A couple of other people also joined us today, but his enthusiasm for Hari-katha definitely makes it a little more festive than on other days. I was feeling a little low before I came, and left in much better spirits., Today's verse-- vṛndāvaneśvari tavaiva padāravindaṁ premāmṛtaika-makaranda-rasaugha-pūrṇam | hṛdy arpitaṁ madhupateḥ smara-tāpam ugraṁ nirvāpayat parama-śītalam āśrayāmi ||13|| O Vrindavaneshwari ! I take shelter of your supremely cooling lotus feet, so full of the unlimited essence of the ambrosia of pure love, which when placed on Krishna's chest, extinguish the violent blaze of his desire. Ananta Das talks about separation in the commentary. He makes the point that separation is not just considere

Two old posts published

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(1) " Gita 3.3" from December last year. This is about the pravritti-nivritti marga ideas that were recently revisited in the " Gita, chapter 6 and Yoga" post. (2) " The heroic mood ," from February this year. This is a continuation of various themes that I have been reflecting from time to time. In particular it is the result of reading Vivekananda's biography and B.G. Narasingha Maharaja's edition of Prakrita-rasa-shata-dushani . I had reservations about both of these posts, and I suppose if I reread them really carefully, I would see what those reservations were. But for the time being, they will stand up fairly well pretty much as they are. I have a few others that might be presentable in the same way, which I will update and post when I get the chance. Radhe Radhe !

Move your butt to Braja, O mind!!

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Since my own laptop has been on the blink I have had to share the office computers with Souresh. He has been out most of the time lately, so I could pretty much use them when I wanted. That is no longer the case, so I am missing a bit of the independence I have enjoyed until now. I will need to buy a new laptop, but unfortunately I don't have the money right now. This morning I could not work from 5.30 to 7.30 as usual. I am in my 8.30-12.30 period now. Yesterday evening I was tired and did not write anything for the blog. I cannot afford to let up on the self-discipline if I want to get Bh.S. finished before leaving India, along with a lot of the other stuff I need to get done. Nevertheless, again a "pro forma" post. A lot goes through my head, which I would like to share, but fatigue, distractions, or lack of time make it all fizzle into the maha-shunya. =================== Yesterday we read RRSN 9, a nice verse, but very direct and uncompromising: vṛndāni